


Coulomb's Law

by medusa20



Category: Big Bang Theory
Genre: AU, Angst, Character Death, F/M
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2012-06-17
Updated: 2012-06-17
Packaged: 2017-11-07 23:37:34
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: Major Character Death
Chapters: 5
Words: 7,381
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/436691
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/medusa20/pseuds/medusa20
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>The tale of twenty years in the life of a failed actress and her physicist employer</p>
            </blockquote>





	1. Chapter 1

**Author's Note:**

> Law formulated by C.-A. de Coulomb that describes the electric force between charged objects. It states that (1) like charges repel each other and unlike charges attract each other, (2) the attraction or repulsion acts along the line between the two charges, (3) the size of the force varies inversely as the square of the distance between the two charges, and (4) the size of the force is proportional to the value of each charge.
> 
> Britannica Concise Encyclopedia

Once I'm with the Wizard, my whole life will change

 _The Wizard and I_ from _Wicked_

 

 

 

Penny almost missed the ad. She sat on a park bench, nursing her whole milk Dunkin Donuts mocha Coolatta. It had cost her almost four dollars but it was the only meal she would have today. Penny figured the fat in the whole milk and whipped cream would keep her sated while the caffeine would provide energy she didn't have and cocoa was some kind of appetite suppressant, right?

She scanned the help wanted again. The ad she almost ignored because it had the word "Personal" was in the bottom right corner . She moved her thumb to reveal the word 'assistant".

"This looks promising." She slurped up ice and coffee.

The job promised regular hours, competitive salary and, hang on!, a residence rent-free. Penny looked at her current residence. The car had certainly seen better days. It no longer was fiery red. More like exhausted red. However, one of the prerequisites for this job was that the applicant had to own a car. Penny eyed the car again. It got her from point A to point B and if that's all the qualification she needed, then she was going to nail this interview. She took out Bernadette's cell phone and placed a call to one Dr. Leonard Hofstader.

XXXX

Penny walked up the five flights of stairs to Apartment 4A. She wore a black skirt and a simple white jersey- basically an old Cheesecake factory uniform she snagged when they fired her for dumping a drink over the head of a customer with a groping issue. Her mother always said black and white was a smart combination.

She knocked on the door which was opened by a man about her height. His curls sprung straight up from the top of his head and he squinted through his glasses as if they were the wrong prescription. He had a warm smile and seemed genuinely happy to see her.

"Penny?"

"Dr. Hofstader?"

"Please, call me Leonard." They shook hands and he ushered her into the apartment.

There were whiteboards everywhere. The only objects more prolific than the boards were the books which were dwarfed in number by the video games. The boards had numbers and symbols and problems over every inch of them.

"What kind of doctor are you?" She asked. It appeared every video game was in alphabetical order and separated by genre.

"Me?" Leonard said. "I'm an experimental physicist."

What the hell did that mean?

"Why do you need a personal assistant?" Penny kept turning in a slow circle then stopped. Her eyes had just found an entire bookshelf filled with superhero- were those _dolls_?- in their original boxes.

Leonard cleared his throat. He was the one who was supposed to be asking the questions.

"The position isn't for me. It's for Dr. Cooper."

"Hold on, "Penny looked over her shoulder. "Who is Dr. Cooper?"

"Dr. Sheldon Cooper. He lives here. And you'll be working for him."

At that moment, from the back hall an imperious voice demanded, "Leonard, to whom are you speaking?" The voice was followed by a very tall man. The first thing Penny thought was that he must be colorblind. Why else would he pair a blue shirt with a red gun on it with a green and gray striped long -sleeved undershirt and finish it off with khaki pants? She didn't even want to give the shoes another look. The second thing she noticed were his startlingly blue eyes. The color practically slapped her in the face from across room. Right now, those eyes were glaring viciously at her.

"Hello." She greeted. "I'm…"

"I'll get to you later." This beanpole spit at her. "Leonard, explain yourself."

Leonard sighed. "Sheldon, we've been through this. _I_ no longer live here. _I_ am getting married in four months therefore _you_ need an assistant."

This was Dr. Cooper! Holy crap on a cracker! He looked like someone stretched out a sixth-grader.

"What are her qualifications?" Dr. Cooper snapped.

"Um…let's see," Leonard mused. "She has a car, she doesn't know you and she answered the ad."

Dr. Cooper whipped his head toward Penny.

"Did you go to college?"

"Junior college. I came here to be an actress but it didn't pan out." He cast a scathing look at Leonard.

"Why do you want this job?" He continued.

"Why do you need an assistant?" She retorted. Dr. Cooper chewed on his upper lip; Leonard gave her a tiny thumbs up.

"Seeing as you will not be filling the position, I do not have to respond to your query." Dr. Cooper told her. "Good day." He took two steps toward the door then froze, pointing at the floor.

"What's wrong?" Leonard said.

"Sp…sp…spider." Dr. Cooper stammered. Leonard jumped and shielded himself behind the taller man. Penny followed the long extended index finger. Oh yeah, there it was. Big one, too- legs all over the place.

"Now, we're trapped here until this arachnid decides to eat us" Dr. Cooper wailed.

"Oh for God's sake!" Penny huffed. She approached the spider and gave it a firm, fatal squashing with her high heeled shoe.

"Now it's dead." She announced.

"You're hired." Dr. Cooper breathed.


	2. Chapter 2

Once I'm with the Wizard and I prove my worth….

_The Wizard and I_ from _Wicked_

 

 

 

Leonard clapped his hands together. "Glad that is settled. Let me give you the details."

"Hold on!" Dr. Cooper said. "We haven't been properly introduced. I am Dr. Sheldon Lee Cooper, Senior Theoretical Particle Physicist at Caltech." Penny noticed he didn't offer his hand. Rather, both were kept clasped behind his back.

"I'm Penny."

"Penny." He repeated, wrinkling his nose. "Leonard, I'm not sure I can have an assistant named after a piece of currency that is constantly being threatened with obscurity."

Penny was certain she had just been insulted- she just wasn't sure how.

"Then kill your own spiders." Penny shrugged and turned to leave. Dr. Cooper was thoroughly taken aback. "Very well, Miss…"

"Just call me Penny."

"Alrighty, Penny," he made a face as if her name left a bad taste in his mouth. "You may call me Dr. Cooper."

Penny, of course, had several other names lined up for him but she turned her attention to Leonard. "You said this job came with an apartment?"

XXXX

Leonard led her across the hall , explaining that 4B used to be Sheldon's lab but now the spare bedroom in 4A served that purpose. Inside, it was immaculate. Like hospital clean. Penny immediately fell in love with the French doors and sweet little bedroom. There was even some furniture.

"Now," Leonard handed her a binder. "here are Sheldon's schedules, menus, habits and a brief synopsis of his life." Penny scanned the biography. An IQ of 187? His first PhD at sixteen? _First!_ The other sections were labeled just as Leonard said: meals, work, recreation, research. The last section, labeled "rules and idiosyncrasies, was the biggest one.

"This looks like a manual." She commented.

"It is. There is even a troubleshooting section in the back." Leonard pointed to the only red tab in the binder. There was a grid with potential scenarios on the left and varying degrees of solutions to the right. There was also a list of contacts. Leonard's name and number were at the top followed by a Howard Wolowitz and a Raj Koothrappali. The final name was typed in bold, red , twenty point font- Mrs. Mary Cooper.

"That number," He indicated the red one, "is Sheldon's mother. She is for dire emergencies. His Kryptonite, if you will, when all else fails.

"Noted." Penny closed the manual.

"So, all you need to do is follow the schedules, get him out for exercise a few times a week and be on call twenty-four /seven."

"Twenty-four/seven" She cried.

Leonard waved a dismissive hand. "Don't worry. Sheldon is rigorous about his sleep schedule. You'll have from 9:30 on to yourself every night plus most of the weekend. There are just a few business matters. You'll have health insurance through the university since you are in Sheldon's employ and he is still, technically, employed by them."

"Yeah, about that." Penny interrupted. "How come he doesn't leave the apartment? Does he have angoraphobia?"

"Agoraphobia." Leonard corrected gently. "And, no. Sheldon can no longer function on campus but he does video lectures three times a month, another of your responsibilities." Leonard cleared his throat. "There was an incident a while back which resulted in Sheldon's having to "rest" if you catch my meaning. His humiliation was so great as was the university's that all parties mutually agreed that he would telecommute."

"What happened?"

Leonard strolled over to the laptop on the kitchen island. Penny followed. He brought up a YouTube video entitled _Physicist Melts Down_.

"Sheldon won an award and was very nervous about speaking in public." Leonard pressed play. "We gave him some wine to relax though he normally doesn't drink. At all."

Penny watched as a clearly intoxicated Dr. Cooper rambled on stage then took his pants off. She gasped when he mooned the entire audience.

"It was terrible." Leonard lamented but Penny caught the laughter bubbling under his words. Her eyes narrowed and her heart broke a little for her new employer.

XXXX

Knock! Knock! Knock!

"Penny."

Knock! Knock! Knock!

"Penny."

Knock! Knock! Knock!

"Penny."

Penny's head jerked up off the pillow. This was the first time she had slept in a bed in over a month and now she was being awakened at…she found the clock. 4:30AM! She stumbled to the door, reminding herself that this job gave her a roof over her head and she could not kill the man on the other side of the door. Though, that would also garner her three hots and a cot too so may be murder was an option.

She blinked at Dr. Cooper once she opened the door because she had never seen a shirt with a TV test pattern on it before.

"You're not dressed." He said. Penny looked down at her pajamas. Now the genius aspect was very clear.

"Is something wrong, Dr. Cooper?"

"Yes. You are not dressed and ready. We only have forty-five minutes."

"Where are we going?" Her brain was still on the pillow. Dr. Cooper sighed.

"Clearly, you did not look at today's schedule. The Orionid meteor shower is occurring this morning and we will be videotaping it for my research." Leonard had mentioned videotaping as one of her duties.

"I'll be ready in a minute." Penny told him.

"That's about all the time you have. Bring a jacket; it's cold up there." When she came out, Dr. Cooper was tapping his wristwatch.

"Finally!" he exclaimed. "Help me with the equipment." Dr. Cooper headed up the stairs , leaving Penny to heft the two large carrying cases on her own.

XXXX

Fortunately, meteor showers do not last very long and they headed back down stairs by seven o'clock.

"I must say, Penny, I was very impressed with your disposal of that dirty sock up there. Simply fearless. Not to mention your ingenious use of the chewing gum in your jacket pocket to hold the leg on the tripod steady."

"I grew up on a farm." Penny struggled with the cases. "You learn how to MacGyver things and a dirty sock is no match for a pile of steaming manure." She dropped the cases unceremoniously at Dr. Cooper's door.

"Aren't you going to carry them in?" The doctor cocked his head.

"You got them out, you are perfectly capable of getting them back in." Penny scolded. "I am going back to bed."

"Don't forget one o'clock."

She paused in opening her door. "What happens at one o'clock?"

"Grocery shopping." He clarified. "We leave here at 1, arrive at the store at 1:15, leave at 1:45 and return here at 2 in time for me to watch Battlestar Galactica. All this information is in …"

"I know. The manual." Penny cut him off. "Dr. Cooper, what is all this research for, anyway?"

Dr. Cooper crossed his arms. " _What's it for_? Good Lord, woman! Didn't you read your contract?"

"Yes." (No) Penny read the sections headed salary, housing and benefits since those were her priorities.

"Page one, paragraph one, sentence two clearly states that your primary role as my assistant is to _assist_ me in any and all endeavors to obtain the Nobel Prize."

Penny opened her door. "Good to know. I'll see you at one o'clock." She went straight to bed.

XXXX

When they got into her car later, Dr. Cooper and Penny had the first occurrence of an oft-repeated conversation.

"Penny."

"Yes, Dr. Cooper?"

"Your check engine light is on."


	3. Chapter 3

He'll say to me, "I see who you truly are, a girl on whom I can rely."

And that's how we'll begin. The Wizard and I.

_The Wizard and I_ from _Wicked._

 

 

 

_Three months later…._

If Penny was being brutally honest, she had landed a pretty cushy job. Oh sure, Dr. Cooper was a certifiable Whackadoodle but Penny was beginning to understand the balm of routine or "consistency" as he called it.

There was a certain amount of comfort to be derived from chicken ad broccoli always being diced not shredded. To know that one would never wake up on a Sunday morning without clean clothes to wear or to be without reading material on Thursday because of a failure to go to the comic book store. There was even solace in knowing that on the third Thursday of every month, anything could happen.

It was on such a Thursday Penny was in her apartment, contemplating her yogurt . It tasted funny but, then again, yogurt always tasted funny so how could you know the difference? Dr. Cooper's Nerd Herd would be visiting tonight. Penny had exchanged pleasantries two months ago with the other two- Howard and Raj- since they were on her emergency contact list . Howard propositioned her; Raj squeaked. Still, she was glad to see Dr. Cooper had some friends nearly as strange as he.

Her phone rang. When she picked up, she could hear Dr. Cooper ranting in the background.

"Hi, Penny. It's Leonard."

"I want you to know I am vehemently objecting to this." Dr. Cooper railed.

"We'll put it in the minutes," Leonard said to him. "Penny, we have a lot of Chinese food here and we're about to play some games.."

"We only ordered for four people." Dr. Cooper again.

"I'd love to come over." Penny replied.

"That's great." Leonard's smile in his voice was clear while Dr. Cooper shrieked about Leonard blurring the lines between employer and employee.

XXXX

She skipped across the hall, orange tank top, floral shorts and Ugg boots(bought with her first paycheck).

"Hi guys!" She greeted. The other three waved. Dr. Cooper shifted in his spot and frowned at his takeout container. Penny remembered the emergency email Leonard had sent her about the spot. Something about Cartesian coordinates and 0,0,0,0 but the upshot was DON'T SIT IN SHELDON'S SPOT. Penny plopped down on the cushion to his right, picked up a dumpling and tossed into the air, catching it in her mouth.

"I'm in hell." Dr. Cooper moaned.

"So, what are we playing?" Penny served herself some rice.

" _We_ are not playing anything." Dr. Cooper countered. "Wolowitz, Koothrappali, Leonard and I will be playing HALO. You are officially off duty and should not be here." Penny ignored him(another tactic in the manual). She picked up a control and blew away a giant ship.

"Awesome!" Howard cried while Leonard clapped.

"Who did I just hit?"

"Sheldon." Leonard told her. Penny turned innocent green eyes on Dr. Cooper who was visibly flustered.

"I call eternal dibs." he finally said. "She is my employee ergo she is on my team."

XXXX

Dr. Cooper insisted Penny take him to the comic book store one Wednesday. Leonard's wedding was a month away and he was helping Stephanie write the thank you notes for their bridal shower. Howard was on a juice fast with his mother and too weak to move while Raj was negotiating his way out of an arranged marriage. Penny didn't want to go but Dr. Cooper threatened to review the paragraph about the comic book store in her contract so she gave in to him. She'd make good use of the time and send her nephew some comic books.

When she walked into the shop, every man in there froze. Dr. Cooper left her stranded by the door.

"Can I help you? I'm Stuart. This is my store"

Penny saw a pleasant looking man with hair curlier than Leonard's. "I'm Penny and I need a comic book for a thirteen year old." Stuart led her over to a display rack.

Dr. Cooper joined her at the checkout twenty minutes later. Penny had just handed Stuart her number.

"Hey, Sheldon." Stuart greeted.

"Stuart." Dr. Cooper gave a nod.

"How come he can call you Sheldon?" Penny wondered.

" _He_ doesn't work for me. We've been through this. The appropriate use of titles is a well-established means of maintaining boundaries."

"You work for him?" Stuart rang up Sheldon's purchases.

"I'm his assistant. Almost four months now." Penny beamed.

"Stuart, I'm sure you understand. Good help is so hard to find." Sheldon sighed and headed out the door.

When they got into her car but before they reached 2311 Los Robles, Dr. Cooper asked Penny a highly personal question.

"Penny, I'm going to ask you a highly personal question." Penny tried not to smile- he was being so serious.

"Go ahead, Dr. Cooper. If I don't want to answer, I won't."

"Are you about to embark on an ill-fated relationship with Stuart?"

Penny stopped at a red light. "I hope not. I actually think it will be quite pleasant." Dr. Cooper snorted.

"Will it bother you in some way if I do go out with Stuart, Dr. Cooper?" She didn't know why she asked nor why his opinion mattered.

Dr. Cooper stared out the window for three more sets of lights before answering. "Only if, when you relationship does come to its inevitable messy end, it results in my being banned from the comic book store."

XXXX

Penny's first date with Stuart went perfectly well until the end. Somehow, Dr. Cooper invited himself in for coffee as well and, while she fell asleep on her couch, he and Stuart argued about Batman!

XXXX

Leonard burst into 4A two weeks before his wedding. Penny was cross-referencing data about quarks or quacks. Whatever.

"Where is he?" Leonard fumed.

"In the lab but…" Leonard had already stomped down the hall as Penny softly finished, "but he doesn't want to be disturbed."

A few minutes later, the shouting began. Leonard's, that is.

"How can you do this, Sheldon! The wedding is two weeks away." Dr. Cooper answered but it was inaudible.

"I don't care about your damn glossophobia! You are the best man and the best man makes the toast!"

"Then I suggest," The door opened with Dr. Cooper's words, "you find a new best man or make Wolowitz give the toast." Leonard followed him into the living room. His hands were anchored in his curls.

"Sheldon, I don't want another best man and Howard's toast will have to be censored."

Dr. Cooper walked over to his whiteboard and began writing. Penny sat absorbed in the argument.

"Leonard, I don't know what to tell you. I swore never to speak in public again. Just the thought of it makes me feel faint."

"If you win the Nobel, you have to make a speech." Leonard snapped.

" _When_ I win the Nobel, I will deal with it." Dr. Cooper finished his calculation.

"I can help." Penny piped up. "I learned all kinds of relaxation techniques in acting class."

Dr. Cooper raised an eyebrow. "They won't work. I'll faint before I even get the chance to initiate them."

"Penny will be there to revive you." Leonard said.

"Oh, I wasn't invited." Penny said.

"Sheld-DON." Leonard's voice rose.

"I didn't think I would be attending so I didn't show her the invitation. It's on the refrigerator." Leonard retrieved the invitation and showed Penny her name along with Dr. Cooper's on the envelope.

"Well, Sweetie," She called to her boss. "Guess you'll be making that toast now." Dr. Cooper growled.

XXXX

The toast was actually sweet and vaguely funny if the audience understood physics jokes. Dr. Cooper could run through it just fine with her as well as Howard and Raj but whenever Penny setup an audience of Care Bears, he fainted dead away.

XXXX

Penny crouched down and tried to keep her gold lame gown off the floor. Dr. Cooper lay on the carpet of the photo suite, hyperventilating.

"I can't do it, Penny. I can't"

She stood up. God, her feet were screaming in these shoes! She had tried relaxation techniques with him; she had tried coddling him and being supportive. Now, it was time to bring out Nebraska. She pushed up imaginary sleeves.

"Sheldon, get up!" At the use of his name, he lifted his head.

"Are you trying to tell me Dr. Sheldon Lee Cooper, holder of two PhD's, youngest recipient of the Stevens award, the man who built his own working CAT scanner at the age of twelve, doesn't have the _balls_ to give a wedding toast?"

Dr. Cooper continued to stare at her.

"If that's the case," Penny put her hands on her hips, "then you're an embarrassment to that Superman t-shirt you have on under your tuxedo."

"How dare you!" He hissed and scrambled to his feet.

"I dare," Penny poked him right in the middle of the S, "because, for once, it's not about you! It's about your best friend."

Dr. Cooper fixed her with his clear azure gaze; Penny stared back. Years later, she would say that's when the variables coalesced but that would be many years and many Pennys from now.

Dr. Cooper squared his shoulders and marched out to the center of the dance floor. He took the microphone from the band leader. Penny returned to her seat. Dr. Cooper looked around until he found her. Their gazes locked. Through his entire toast, his voice never wavered and neither did his eyes.


	4. Chapter 4

And I'll stand there with the Wizard,

Feeling things I've never felt…

 _The Wizard and I_ from _Wicked_

 

 

 

Penny's next date with Stuart was a week after Leonard's wedding. They had dinner, strolled along the avenue. It was a lovely evening and Penny thought that there might be a potential something developing. Stuart walked her to her door and leaned in to kiss her. Penny's mind wandered to a mouth with a fuller lower lip than the top one, frequently twisted in haughty derision. The kiss deepened; electric blue eyes closed and _those hands_ encircled her waist.

"Penny."

"Yes, Sheldon."

Suddenly the air was cool around her.

"I meant, Stuart." She finished lamely. The hurt on Stuart's face was unbearable.

"Didn't expect that." He said.

"Neither did I." Penny replied. Stuart placed an awkward hand on her shoulder. "I'm gonna go but I'll see you around."

"I'm so sorry." was all Penny could think of to say.

XXXX

_Ten months later- December 21_

Penny came into 4A clutching the box wrapped in candy cane paper. Leonard was on the couch.

"How's Stephanie?" Penny asked.

"She's in her fourth month so the nausea's over. She can still move comfortably. We're in a good place now." Leonard indicated the box in her hand. "Is that it?"

"I can't wait to give it to him." Her excitement shone in her eyes.

"I wish you would. He's been moaning and groaning about gifts and obligations for two weeks now. I also think he's a little anxious that you're going home to Nebraska for the holidays." Leonard didn't add that Sheldon's anxiety was a good thing because it indicated that he was beginning to live outside his head again, to care once more.

Penny sat on the middle cushion, _her_ unofficial spot, on the couch. "I told him to come with me or go to Texas but that just earned me a lecture on the statistics of snowstorms ,airport delays. Blah! Blah! Blah!"

Leonard laughed. It was amazing how she had adapted to Sheldon and he to her(though he'd deny it to his very end) in such a short time. Leonard cared deeply for both of them and remained hopeful.

Dr. Cooper came from his bedroom. Penny was there holding the dreaded Christmas present but he was well prepared as always. Every possible size and combination of scented bath products was in his room. He would give her the basket directly proportional to the value of her gift. From the size of the box on her lap, it appeared he'd be distributing one of the smaller baskets. Disappointment nipped at him.

"Merry Christmas, Dr. Cooper." Penny stood up. Sheldon noticed her red Santa hat heightened the color of her cheeks.

"Thank you, Penny." He took the box and opened it. "Oh, a napkin."

"Turn it over." She instructed.

Sheldon did so and all the blood drained out of him. It couldn't be! Written there in indelible ink: _To Sheldon, Live long and Prosper, Leonard Nimoy_. He grabbed the chair behind him. He couldn't breathe.

"I went to visit Bernadette at the Cheesecake Factory and there he was. Sorry the napkin's dirty- he wiped his mouth with it." Sheldon was going to faint.

"I posses the DNA of Leonard Nimoy!" He cried. He dashed to his room, returning with every basket in there. Sheldon piled them all around his bewildered assistant.

"Dr. Cooper!"

"I know," He fretted. "It's not enough, is it?" Sheldon looked at her then. She wore a bemused smile, her Santa hat cocked at a charming angle over Christmas-green eyes. Penny had done so much for him in the…a year already! They had had a few secret driving lessons and he had even semi-conquered his fear of public speaking. All because of her. Now this gift- the best present he had ever received or hoped to receive.

Sheldon clambered over the baskets and sought the perfect alignment of their bodies. He pulled her to him as if his arms would shatter with the contact.

"Leonard, look! Dr. Cooper's hugging me!"

His voice, when it sounded in her ear, was deeper and softer than she had ever heard it.

"You can call me Sheldon."

Penny realized none of the bath products smelled as good as the man clasping her to his rapidly beating heart.

XXXX

When Penny and Sheldon arrived at the hospital, the baby had just finished eating. Sheldon handed a large pink floral arrangement to Stephanie and shook Leonard's hand. Penny quickly put down her gift bag filled to overflowing with onesies and outfits and washed her hands. Sheldon stood by the window with his hands clasped behind his back.

"Gimme, gimme." Penny squealed, reaching for the infant. Leonard passed off the small, warm bundle.

"Hello Aurora." Penny cooed. "Hello, you sweet , little thing." She took in the miniscule fist, the mouth like a bow, the eyes clamped shut. An ache centered in her heart.

"What color are her eyes?" Penny asked. Sheldon hadn't moved. Always observing; never interacting.

"Brown." Leonard said. "Hopefully, she'll have better eyesight."

"Sheldon, do you want to hold her?" Stephanie smiled. "You could probably do it with just one hand."

"No, thank you." He said politely. Penny walked over to him and stood so he could look at the baby over her shoulder. Stephanie gave Leonard a quick nudge to direct his attention to them.

"Sheldon, have you ever seen anything so perfect before in your life?"

"Yes, I have." Sheldon replied while Leonard and Stephanie noticed his eyes were on his assistant not the baby.

XXXX

_Four years later_

Penny knew what the envelope was without looking at the address. It was thick, creamy stationary and the contents were heavy. Experience had taught her that only good news came in hefty expensive envelopes.

She sprinted up the stairs and burst through the door, startling Sheldon who spilled Mountain Dew all over his Rubik's Cube shirt.

"Sheldon! Sheldon! Oh my God!" The rest of the mail fell to the floor while she waved the cream-colored envelope in the air. The physicist snatched it from her hand and steadied himself by grabbing the island when he saw the return address was Stockholm.

"I can't open it." His hand trembled as he gave it back to her. Penny ripped it open heedless that Sheldon would probably want to save the envelope for posterity. She scanned the letter with a smile growing wider by the minute.

"You did it, Sweetie. Or, should I say, Dr. Nobel Laureate."

Sheldon's reaction to the Nimoy napkin was nonchalant compared to his reaction now. He sank to his knees then doubled over touching his forehead to the floor. Penny dropped beside him. He was muttering softly.

"At last. At last. At last."

"Sheldon, do you want some water?"

His head shot up and his blue eyes were filled with tears.

"Penny, I did it."

"I know."

Sheldon got to his feet and seemed lost in the apartment. He touched each whiteboard, smiling. Penny thought her heart would burst. She had never seen him happy. He sat in his spot for a few minutes.

"Penny, I think I'm having a heart attack."

"You're not. It's just adrenaline." She assured him.

"I have to start on my speech. We have to make travel arrangements. Pack. Get immunized…"

Penny walked over to him. "Sheldon, we have plenty of time for that. Just enjoy the moment."

He looked up at her as if suddenly realizing she had been with him all along. His tall frame rose from the couch. He leaned toward her uncertainly. His long arms rested gently around her; Penny leaned into the hug, relishing his warmth and touch. Sheldon pulled her closer. The smell of honeysuckle would forever be associated with the supreme moment of his life.

"Thank you, Penny. Your support has been immeasurable."

XXXX

Penny spent her thirtieth birthday in Stockholm. The ceremony was a just a bit overwhelming, the gowns a bit ostentations and Sheldon's speech was just a bit too long. He never mentioned her name, not once. She didn't mind. Her finger touched the circular pendant of thirty diamonds on a delicate platinum chain at her neck. A gift presented to her this morning from Sheldon for entering a new decade and six years of service. Her own personal Nobel Prize


	5. Chapter 5

And so it shall be for the rest of my life

And I'll want nothing else till I die.

Oh what a pair we'll be, the Wizard and I.

_The Wizard and I_ from _Wicked_

 

 

After Sheldon won the Nobel, there were endless trips, interviews with science periodicals and invitations to speak at universities. He even received an offer to write three books. Penny was there for every meeting, seminar and interview. At one point, it seemed they had spent an entire week on an airplane.

They sat in an airport waiting to board their flight to Indiana which would take them to Notre Dame for a two day symposium. Penny was buried in a novel. Sheldon shifted in the seat next to her then got up and paced. He sat in a different chair only to resume pacing.

"I'm going home." He announced. Penny marked her place in her book.

"Sweetie, we'll be home in three days."

"No." Sheldon's voice attracted attention. "I want to go home. NOW. I'm sick of airplanes. I'm sick of hotels. I miss my spot."

Penny stood up and placed her hand in the crook of his elbow. "Sheldon, you agreed to this."

"Well, now I am dis-agreeing to it." He pulled his arm away and headed toward the ticket counter. "Take care of it, Penny. Call Notre Dame and deal with it."

Penny stood with her mouth open. This was so like him- make demands, throw a tantrum then everyone else cleans up the mess and by "everyone", she meant herself.

" 'Take care of it, Penny.'" She mimicked so flawlessly that Sheldon stopped walking. " 'Take care of it Penny' 'Get my tangerine chicken, Penny', Find me an allergen-free pillow, Penny', 'I don't like the shade of blue of this ink, Penny', I have to drink water from a bottle with a screw cap not a squeeze spout, _Penny_ '!" Sheldon now faced her, his eyes bright with anger.

"Not once, " She continued yelling, "in six years have I ever heard you say ' _I'll_ take care of it, Penny.' " Sheldon crossed his arms.

"Or," She spread her arms, "ask 'What would you like, Penny?'"

"What would you like Penny?"

"I want to fly home first class." It was the first thought that came to her mind.

"Done!"

She blinked; her hand flew to her throat covering the circle pendant. "Really, Sheldon? You would do that for me?"

The Nobel Laureate walked over to her. Penny tilted her head up. His right hand drifted up to her face. Penny closed her eyes, waiting for his touch. Instead, Sheldon tucked a piece of hair behind her left ear.

"Don't look so surprised." He told her.

XXXX

A person's life is a series of events, big and small. Most go unnoticed until the person realizes, "This is my life." Other times, life isn't so subtle. Sometimes it wakes a person up(Penny) on a Monday morning with all the force of a punch in the throat and says "Hey! This is _your_ life and you _might_ want to do something about it."

She was thirty-five. How did that happen? She was supposed to be an actress. This job was a means for getting a place to live. Her eyes traveled around the small bedroom. Her life had become as compartmentalized as Sheldon's. Where was the fame? The money? She had a new car but that was all.

Penny looked at the clock. Sheldon would be expecting her in ninety minutes. She couldn't do it. She couldn't face another Monday of Thai food. She couldn't deal with making sure the yellow pencils didn't intermingle with the blue pens or that the only markers were Expo because the others "smelled funny".

She pulled a pillow over her head. If she didn't get up, that damn triple knock would shake her door and the thought made her teeth hurt. She was so tired of this, of him, of being alone.

Of course, that wasn't Sheldon's fault. Actually, it was. Penny had tried dating. Didn't work out well. Sheldon had texted her incessantly about when she would be home…well, that only happened once or twice. She didn't date because after years of Sheldon(with some influence from Howard, Leonard and Raj), other men were just so _stupid_. They also never had eyes the right shade of blue. Penny picked up her phone and sent Sheldon a text message.

XXXX

Dr. Stephanie Hofstader had just finished washing the last pan from dinner when the doorbell rang three times.

"Aurora! Get the door. Daddy probably forgot his keys again."

The door bell kept ringing until Stephanie heard the door squeak. Suddenly, the house was filled with the cries of the five Hofstader children.

"Uncle Shelly! Uncle Shelly!"

"Read my lab report!"

"Come see my volcano."

The twins just chanted, "Read! Read!" while baby Emily simply demanded, "Up, pease."

Stephanie walked into the living room to find Sheldon trying to appease all five of them at once.

"Fall in, troops." She commanded. The clamoring stopped. "Everyone, upstairs now. Leave Uncle Shelly alone." For Sheldon to visit unannounced, there was a problem. Stephanie waited until the door to the nursery closed.

"Sheldon, what's wrong?" His hair was wild, his eyes fully panicked. The agitation practically made him vibrate.

"Where is she? Where did she go?"

"Who?" Stephanie used her best toddler comforting voice.

"Penny!" Sheldon twanged. "She up and left with out a word.

"Stephanie sat on the couch. "She left?"

"She sent me a text." Sheldon had his accent back under control. "Sheldon, I'm taking a sick day because I am sick of it." He recited from memory. "What does that mean?"

"Oh, Sheldon." Stephanie knew this was going to happen sooner or later.

"I went into her apartment. Her phone and laptop are there but her clothes are gone. Her car is gone. _Her shoes_ are gone."

"Sheldon, I think what Penny meant…"

"How could she do this?" He continued his rant. "We have an outline to submit to the publishers. She changed the password on her laptop and I can't get into it. My dry cleaning needs to be picked up. What am I supposed to do with all the milk in my refrigerator?"

"I think, "Stephanie tried again. "The problem is…"

"The problem is, "Sheldon interrupted. "Penny is gone. I don't know where she is. I need her and I want her back."

"Stephanie sat back on the couch. "That's exactly what you have to tell her."

XXXX

Penny pocketed the lousy two dollar tip and threw the plates into the large plastic bin. Leonard was there when she turned around.

"The Cheesecake Factory took you back?"

"It's been ten years." Penny said. "Management's changed."

"Can we talk?" Penny sat at the table she just cleared. Leonard sat across from her. Her hair was lank and lifeless. Her eyes had circles under them and she was thin. Almost as thin as Sheldon.

"Penny, it's been a month."

"I'm not going back." She shook her head. Leonard took off his glasses and cleaned them.

"Penny remember what Sheldon was like when you met him?" She nodded, biting her lip. "Remember the story I told you about when I met him- what he was like?" She nodded again.

"Right now," Leonard put his glasses back on, "I would throw a full-fledged gala if either of those Sheldons replaced the one I'm dealing with now." Penny raised her eye brows.

"Leonard, you of all people should understand."

"I do. Believe me, I know what and who he is but so do you."

Penny stared at her chipped nail polish. "I need Sheldon to…" She paused to stop the tears.

Leonard waited before speaking. "Penny, I've seen you two have entire conversations without exchanging a single word. If nothing is explicitly said, does that make it any less real?"

"Leonard I don't want to deal with abstract truths right now."

"Ah, Penny," He sighed. "If you saw him, saw yourself right now, it would be all the truth you would need."

XXXX

_Two weeks later_

Penny walked into 4A. Everything seemed exactly like she had left it. Sheldon wasn't one to live in squalor or lose his grip on personal hygiene. He'd even cleaned her apartment when she was at Bernadette's. Sheldon expressed emotional discomfort through incorrigible behavior. Even Stephanie couldn't deal with him anymore. She had enough whiny toddlers in her life, she said.

Penny smelled her coffee brewing(apparently, he had been making and disposing of pots of coffee for six weeks) as she set up the video equipment. Sheldon came out of his room fully dressed in Green Lantern, orange undershirt and khaki pants. Absolutely horrifying.

"Good morning." He said stiffly.

"Good morning.' She answered. Sheldon fixed her coffee and handed it to her. Penny pulled the whiteboard into the shot.

"It's very difficult to videotape oneself especially when the tripod leg does not stay locked." Sheldon informed her.

"I am sure we can spare some of your Nobel money for a new tripod." Penny sipped her coffee. Perfect as always.

"Shall we begin?" Sheldon walked to the whiteboard. Penny put her cup down.

"You have nothing to say to me?"

Sheldon stared back at her. A muscle in his left cheek spasmed repeatedly. Penny was all set to leave again. This was beyond ridiculous. She turned to the door.

"Penny." She faced him, trying not to get pulled in as deeply as before.

"You must never do that again. The stress to my circulatory system, not to mention my digestive system and the disruption of my routine due to your absence were unbearable. It will not do to have such upheaval in my life. Is that clear?

Penny covered her mouth with her hand. what had she expected- an undying declaration of love an devotion? Except, when she translated the Sheldonese, that's exactly what it was.

"Crystal." She smiled.

XXXX

_Ten years later_

The ending credits of Superman were on the TV. "Time for bed, Sweetie." Penny looked over her shoulder. Sheldon was dozing. His hair was grey at the temples; he was almost fifty. About five years ago, her mother had stopped asking when and if Penny was ever going to get married when Penny's reply had been, "I couldn't possibly leave Sheldon to go on something as ridiculous as a honeymoon."

"Sheldon." She gave him a poke. He woke with a start and winced.

"What's wrong?" Penny asked.

"Nothing." He muttered. "A slight headache. Is there aspirin?"

Penny rose from the couch. "Do you want me to get it?"

Sheldon shook his head and paled slightly. "I'll be fine once I get some sleep." He got to his feet a little slowly.

"Tomorrow, we tape the lecture on centripetal and centrifugal force." Penny said unnecessarily.

Sheldon made a face. "That whole lecture just goes in circles." They shared a laugh. After all these years, Penny knew when he was making an attempt at humor.

"Good night, Penny." He squeezed her hand.

"Goodnight, Sheldon."

XXXX

Penny came into the apartment the next morning but no aroma of coffee greeted her. Strange. For twenty years there had been coffee. She got a pot going.

"Sheldon, let's go." She called but the physicist didn't appear. She knocked on the bathroom door but only silence answered her. Her concern grew as she approached his bedroom. She knocked then opened the door. He was still in his vampire pose.

"Hey, sleepyhead. Did you take a Tylenol PM last night?"

He didn't move. There was no shout of "Danger! Danger!" No admonition that people couldn't be in his room..

Leonard found them in Sheldon's bed a few hours later when the university notified him that no lecture had been uploaded. Penny hadn't stopped crying and Sheldon hadn't woken up.

XXXX

Aneurysm. Leonard told her after the final autopsy. There was nothing that could have been done.

"He told me he had a headache." Penny marveled that she could speak at all. Her days were spent crying and her nights haunting the apartment across the hall. She wouldn't see anyone and no one was allowed to touch anything. After Leonard's phone call, she went back to 4A and sat in the middle of the couch, holding Sheldon's striped pillow for the clear, clean smell of him lingering on it.

XXXX

Leonard, Howard, Raj and Penny each sat in an enormous leather armchair. They were being read Sheldon's will. Raj was given the Green Lantern lantern , the Incredible Hulk hands signed by Stan Lee and all of Sheldon's Hulk comic books. Howard received the balance of the comic book collection to fill the gaps in his own. Each Hofstader child was set up with a small college fund. Leonard was the recipient of all Sheldon's collectibles and t-shirts except for his original Superman shirt. That went to Penny.

"Just a shirt?" Howard gasped but the lawyer continued. The remainder of Sheldon's estate- the money, apartments, writings, publications current and future royalties and publishing rights went to Penny. He even left her his Nobel Prize. None of it registered with Penny who sat there expressionless and unhearing. It was finally Sheldon's turn to take care of her.

"In closing," The lawyer read Sheldon's words, "It is my explicit wish that my brain be donated to science to further the understanding and appreciation of true genius. My heart was given away long ago and it is being well taken care of."

The End


End file.
